the checkup.

today is my second check-up post surgery. met the doctor that removed my tonsil last December. the lab report finally came out. nothing abnormal about my tonsils. just infection.

nothing new about my condition. she clearly didn't got the second opinion she promise me last month.

I printed out article from here; http://happybabyusa.org/2013/01/24/loss-of-taste-after-tonsillectomy/. which suggest few supplements to be taken to speed up the recovery process.

she agree with the article suggestion.

and I go home with two new supplements. B Complex and Iron along with, the B12. 

clearly I am not happy with today's appointment.

but still, I am positive that it will get better. one day. :)

p/s: I notice that I can already taste the distinct flavours of certain food but not how it taste. last couple of days, I drank soy milk. I can taste the soy flavours. but that's it. I don't know whether its sweet or whatever. I ate pineapple and again I can taste the flavours, but I'm not sure whether the pineapple is sweet or sour like how it usually is.

if you don't have anything to say,

don't say nothing at all. Lagi bagus.

p/s: hati tgh kecik. bagi dia masa pulih. biasa la tuh. semua permainan emosi. tp can't help it. :(

Marriage

Another one of my classmate during degree is getting married. ;)

and then,

i eat rice.argghhhh.lega.walaupun rasa tetap blergh.dia mcm lega tau.lega.ok.nak cakap itu je.

oh, did I tell you that..

I'm in no sugar diet. its not hard for me. because I don't really like drinking sweet drink. except chocolates! but its hard when people around you keep shoving sugary things to you. even when you insist that you don't want it.

what's the point of eating sweet things when you can't even taste it?

that's the point of my diet.

I don't know how much I lost. but all my pants, shirts and even my wrist watch starting to get loose.

and this is AWESOME!

I don't know not eating sugar can make you lose your weight so soon like this!

p/s: Cici, Zaty, Eqa & Syu, don't expect me to be really skinny la. HAHAHHA! I just lose some of it but I can already feel the differences. which is good. kan?

dear you,

i write because i need to write. i write what i feel.

that weird taste/sensation

that I felt last week is no longer there. I don't know how to feel about this. part of me feel sad. because I thought it's getting better. but nope. still the same. remember I told you that I can taste the first bite of anything? 

well, it also have gone away. but I think it also a psychological game. because every time I want to eat something, I will imagine how it will taste first. usually things that I am familiar with on how it taste. then, I can taste the first bite and the rest taste totally blergh.

I'm starting to get disappointed with myself. I don't know if this is a good thing. I don't feel like talking to people about this. I hate when they mock me. I hate when they start questioning how everything taste. Like I just made this up. that actually I can taste as normal.

I'm starting to get very annoyed.

Thus, I don't talk.

and sometimes I don't feel like eating because I'm disappointed with myself. and I know it's not good because when hunger strike, I feel like I can eat anything and indulge it and later, disappointing myself all over again.

this is an unfinished business.

I'm positive I can recover from this. I am bothered by this everyday. but I cannot stand other people's reaction on this matter. I really hope they can start thinking of another thing to focus on. another thing to start a topic with me.

I'm hoping.